Jesus was carrying me, holding me close to His heart, all these times..

“He tends his flock like a shepherd: 

He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart;

he gently leads those that have young.” 🙏

Isaiah 40:11

Peace and good to all.

If I may share my personal reflection on the above passage from the Book of Isaiah.

I  have thought before that I have been trained probably by my life experiences to be tough. 

It was 2002, I was driving my car alone following the ambulance that supposed to transfer my sick father from one hospital to another. He died after few hours in the ICU. I was alone. I was  in pain but I could not cry, I needed to fix my mother as it was a big blow for her to lose my father, I needed to arrange my father’s funeral, and many more.  I cried three days after his death. I cried a lot. 

The year was 2018, this same thing happened again, I was following an ambulance that supposed to transfer my mother to another hospital because I did not want her to die yet. I thought that by transferring her to another hospital,  I could prolong her life. But the moment the ambulance carrying her reached the hospital’s entrance, she stopped breathing. I was alone. I could not cry. I needed to take care of everything: pay the bills, fix the funeral service, take care of the family and things she left behind, etcetera, etcetera. Oh yes, I cried. I cried a lot, alone and only after I have taken cared of everything. 

Thinking about those experiences, I asked myself now, was I really alone in those times? The above Bible passage answers my query. No, I don’t think so. I was not alone in those separate times. I was with God.  I was with Jesus in those times. He was with me in my car as I followed the ambulance carrying my father. He was with me as I followed too the ambulance carrying this time, my mother.  He was calming me. He was guiding me, for me to have presence of mind.  He was with my father too and He was with my  mother as well when He brought them with Him in paradise. Not making them suffer through hospital tubes and machines. Not allowing me to suffer as well. 

In those painful times of my life, I know that Jesus was with me, carrying me, giving me support so I can stand and take care of my family.  So that I can stand and carry myself, so I can fulfill His plans for me. So I can be what I am now.  Just as our mothers carry us their children, in their wombs and hearts, God carries us too especially in the hardest part of our lives. 

And, no I was not trained by my life experiences to be tough. I just have a living God who walks with me in facing my life’s battles. He was with me then as He is with me now. 

Just when we thought we are alone facing our life’s battles, remember, we have Jesus who cares for us, we can cast all our anxieties to Him,  my friends, and He will give us rest.   Remember this, we have a God who pick us up and carries us all the way through, when we can walk no more.  He carries us when our bodies could not bear our pains anymore.

 Psalm 56:8

    You have collected all my tears in your bottle.

“You keep track of all my sorrows.

    You have recorded each one in your book.”

God be with you.